After separation or a break-up, love can leave a bad taste in your mouth. Your recent history with love may lead you to believe that you will not venture out and love someone else again. Here we discuss how despite the pain associated with our past experiences we still desire love.
This is part 2 of a 4 part series on love after separation and divorce. If you missed the first part check out Finding Love After Divorce.
I recently stumbled upon a new rendition of “Ring of Fire,” by an acapella group called, “Home Free.”
Not only did the perfect sound of male harmony take my breath away, but I also found myself listening deeper and pondering over the familiar words.
Love is a burning thing
And it makes a fiery ring
Bound by wild desire
I fell into a ring of fire
I fell into a burning ring of fire
I went down, down, down and the flames went higher
And it burns, burns, burns, the ring of fire
The ring of fire
I fell into a burning ring of fire
I went down, down, down and the flames went higher
And it burns, burns, burns, the ring of fire
The ring of fire
The taste of love is sweet
When hearts like ours meet
I fell for you like a child
Oh, but the fire went wild
I fell into a burning ring of fire
I went down, down, down and the flames went higher
And it burns, burns, burns, the ring of fire
The ring of fire
I fell into a burning ring of fire
I went down, down, down and the flames went higher
And it burns, burns, burns, the ring of fire
The ring of fire
And it burns, burns, burns, the ring of fire
The ring of fire
The ring of fire
The ring of fire
Relationship to Love
It seems that most people have a LOVE/HATE relationship with LOVE. When it’s good, it’s SWEET, but when it’s bad, it BURNS!!!
However, no matter the burn, the rub, or the jittery feelings, this quest for love appears universal. Like a long-lost treasure, it seems everywhere in the world people are searching for love and when they find it they are convinced they have found the missing piece that can make life meaningful and worth living.
Interesting, if we go back to an ancient script, The Bible, an entire chapter is written about love. The love chapter is found in 1 Corinthians 13. However, in conclusion, the writer of this epistle says,
“Of all these things, including, faith, hope and love, the greatest is LOVE!”
Think of your current situation, everything you have gone through since the moment you knew you would be separating from your partner. It appears that Faith and Hope are what we hold on to through the process, to get us to the other side.
What do we have faith and hope for?
What is the purpose of faith and hope? May I suggest “to love” and “be loved”. This is the human quest or journey we are all on, yet very few of us understand what love really is, and how it arises in the human heart. It is frequently equated with those tingly feelings that are out of control, or acts of kindness. However, these things in themselves are not love!
First, Love springs from awareness
When you set out to serve someone whom you have not taken the trouble to see, are you meeting that person’s need or your own.?”
Anthony De Mello “The Way to Love”
So, the first ingredient of love is to really and truly see the other!
Reflections
- When is the last time you felt you were truly seen by someone?
- Are you willing to take the time and energy required to truly get to know another person, and truly see then for who they are?
For the next parts in this series, visit:
To Love, Is To EXPOSE Yourself!
Unconditional Love
If you are struggling with love after divorce and separation, contact Sandy to book an appointment today with a Certified Divorce Coach.
